Ode to Daddy

When a woman has a baby she is overflowed with emotions and expectations. The harshest of these expectations comes from herself. She instantly feels the need to immediately be an expert in everything that is her baby. This behavior seems to be essential in the early months of her newborn's life.
However, as her child grows more independent it may be hard to remember that she is not, and never was, alone. There was another person who made it their business to be an instant expert in everything that is her child. From bathing to changing diapers, to fevers to feedings, this person has been there as well.
Daddy.
It's true that a lot of the care for a new baby falls on the mother. This is especially the case with breastfeeding and/or stay-at-home moms. Every moment of every day and night is centered around the small person that has recently come into the world. As a result, it may be hard to remember that Daddy can take care of baby just as well as Mommy.
Feelings of attachment often originate in the womb. A woman goes through a miraculous change while pregnant. According to Tracy Rosecrans of heartline.com, "Pregnancy is [a] time of great physical and emotional change for women."
The 40 weeks of pregnancy is plenty of time to set a woman up to feel like it all rests on her shoulders since all the changes are happening to her body and hers alone.
Society puts a lot of pressure on mothers to fully support and raise their child without any help. There is a heavy expectation that is implied in the early days after birth - your maternal instincts will kick in and you will magically know how to raise a little person (even if you've never been around a small person before...it's that magical) or you're a bad mother.
With guidelines like these, it's hard to remember that there is another person there worrying and dotting over that small person.
Yep, you guessed it - Daddy.
Doctors Richard and Jan Hanson stated that the village it takes to raise a child seems more like a ghost town these days. In their column "Mother Nurture" they say, "The amount of mental and physical work that comes with children is staggering. It ranges from figuring out what color to paint the new baby's bedroom while you're pregnant to -- eighteen years later -- helping him pack for college." 
What's the remedy? Share the load.
This isn't always easy. One of the first things that is told to a new mother is "establish a routine for your child" but that doesn't always include the father. As time passes and the routine becomes sacred it's hard to have confidence in the ability of the father.
The issue of course is not in the ability of the father's child caring skills. It's in the ability of the mother to let go and share the day to day tasks with your partner.
Let go!
It's important for all parents to have a little "Me Time." Everyone gets burnt out. To share the load is to get a little time to yourself. Even if it's just ten or fifteen minutes a day. Use that time to unwind and regroup.
Start with delegating some of the tasks. Assign some of the daily routine to your partner like the bath, getting dressed, story time or a walk. It may be hard at first, but they have been with baby from the beginning as well. More often than not, perhaps even more so with working parents, it gives them a chance to bond with baby since they've been away all day.
So, Daddy - take control of some tasks. Although Mommy may seem a little wary at first, know that it has less to do with her doubting your ability to care for your child and more to do with her inability to release some of the responsibility and sharing the load.

Why "All About That Bass" Is Awesome

The song "All About That Bass" by the 20-year-old Meghan Trainor is heard from the radio to the dance class at the gym. The question is, "why is that?"
Because it's awesome!
Meghan gives voice to all the young girls who are distraught that they don't look like the girls in the magazines. With a strong, beautiful voice and a beat you can't help, but dance to Meghan states plain and clear:
"Cuz every inch of you is perfect, from the bottom to the top."
What tweens and teens don't realize is that the reason they don't look like the girls in the fashion magazines is because the models are fictional. If the girls saw what the models looked like before they were Photoshopped they might feel a little better about themselves.
The song states, "I see the magazines working' that Photoshop. We know that sh*t ain't real. C'mon know, make it stop!"
What's great about that lyric is that it calls out the fashion industry for fabricating beauty which keeps little girls buying their products to look "beautiful." But, what they don't know is that they will never achieve it, since their base of beauty is physically impossible.
Surprisingly, Meghen has received some backlash. One blogger writes for the Feministing stated that the newly declared woman's anthem "All About That Bass" is disappointing. In response to the first verse where Meghan talks about accepting her curvy body, this blogger states, "No need to worry about failing to meet the standard of beauty imposed by the fashion industry, she meets the one imposed by men. Phew, that’s a relief!"
Although both forcing yourself into what the fashion industry claims in beautiful and forcing yourself into the image of what a man might think is beautiful are bad, (no girl of any age should force themselves into any sort of image) To say that you are curvy and that's beautiful is ultimately what she's saying in the song.
The blogger for Feministing goes to say, "OK, but are women who don’t have boom boom disqualified from having beauty? Is beauty the same thing as boom boom?"
This verse states what Meghan Trainor is trying to say. You are perfect the way you are. She is not disqualifying anyone. She is working off the pretense that skinny girls are generally considered beautiful more than curvy ones. Meghan states it clear as day in the first line of the song:
"Yeah, it's pretty clear. I ain't no size 2."
According to USA Today, "Psychologists and eating-disorder experts are worried about the same thing. They say the fashion industry has gone too far in pushing a dangerously thin image that women, and even very young girls, may try to emulate."
The article goes on to say that there are increases in eating disorders in young girls who are trying to lose weight to look like the models depicted in the magazines. The scary thing is that it isn't all photoshop. The lanky, "willowy" look of today's model's has been declared unhealthy by other fashion industry leaders in places like Spain and India.
Girls have enough trouble as it is trying to feel comfortable in their own skin. If a song like "All About That Bass" helps them, then good! So what if the lyrics are little shallow in places? If anything, the song opens the doors for the conversations that we should be having with our young girls about what is beautiful and what is just plain fabricated.